Notes From a Relationship Coach(Big ideas in a small email) “When the time slows, notice where your mind goes. Focus on the eye where the lotus of the mind grows. Here, you will find holes in the blindfolds of your well-defined roles… go behind those.” –Adam Enough, What You Seek In my formative years, seeking connection too often resulted in pain and humiliation, and seeking protection was equally awful and traumatic. So it makes sense why I’ve had big NO THANKS energy all my life. My...

Notes From a Relationship Coach(Big ideas in a small email) “Connection is why we’re here; it is what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.” –Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection Everybody wants love and connection. Humans are literally built for it. But healthy, sustainable love dangles like a carrot on the other side of our wounds. And if we want that yummy carrot, there’s no way around this healing thing. That’s why I was a “relationship coach” for like five minutes before I had to...

Notes From a Relationship Coach(Big ideas in a small email) “Trauma is a response to anything that's overwhelming that happens too much, too fast, too soon, or too long, coupled with a lack of protection or support.” –Resmaa Menakem, My Grandmother’s Hands What a great definition of trauma! I’d like to reiterate that trauma is not the event but how you change in response to it. Also of note, the same event could be non-traumatic given the right protection or support. With this understanding,...